Bonus Ideas ??
There’s nothing that gets people’s creative juices flowing more than sex. If it exists, people will find a way to do it. Horniness is the mother of all creativity.
Don’t believe me? Here are a few of the things you can use to get off.
- Soap
The use of soap is ingenious, because it can be shaped into almost anything. Whether you sculpt it with something sharp or shape it in your hands, soap is soft enough to be modelled easily, and achieve rounded ends that you won’t hurt yourself doing the deed. However, soap in your vag isn’t great, medically speaking, because it can upset the delicate PH balance up there. Make sure to cover that baby up with a condom.
- Candy
I know we’ve already covered the candy penis portion of this program, but there’s another way to do it, especially when means are limited. You take a bunch of candy, melt it down, and then shape a penis out of it. Pretty easy, huh? And sticky, very very very very (very very very) sticky.
- A can of chips + newspapers + cloth
If it sounds painful, it’s because it sure as hell is. A can of Pringles take some getting used to, but even aside from that, the ends are flat, so those ridges will not be comfortable, mawma. You may want to stuff it with some paper and fashion some sort of cushiony head out of cloth or something, so you don’t hurt yourself. Not that uh, that will be your only painful problem with this kind of “dildo”. Make sure you’re quite ready to…welcome it. With all the lube in the world. All of it.
- A purple whale
No, not a literal purple whale, that’s just the wonderfully creative name for what lady inmates sometimes use as a dildo, fashioned out of a tooth brush, or a pencil, or whatever they’re allowed, wrapped in a maxi pad, and then stuffed in a purple glove, which acts as a sort of barrier/holds everything together/is a condom substitute.
- Toilet paper roll
You’d be shocked at what you can achieve from a freaking toilet paper roll. You take one empty roll (or two, if you want it to be longer) and stuff it with toilet paper. Make sure some of it is sticking out on the other side, to form a makeshift head. Then, you get tape and start wrapping it around it, covering it from one end to the other. You can then start wrapping the base in more toilet paper, in order to get it thicker, not only for insertion purposes, but also so it won’t get stuck up there.
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